A beauty pageant. With an evening wear section, and even a swimsuit section.

I’m not quite sure what I was thinking, but I guess I wanted to challenge myself, and my disease, and just see if I could do something most psoriasis sufferers probably wouldn’t dream of.

Actually, something I wouldn’t usually dream of!

I saw my dermatologist, and he helped me with my goal, treating my skin aggressively until I was almost all clear.

I remember on the night of the pageant, when I had to get into my swimsuit, trying to cover a few patches that remained on the back of my legs. I couldn’t quite see them, but I knew they were there, and I was standing in the corner subtly trying to smear concealer over the offending spots.

I was terrified. Surrounded by these seemingly flawless girls in their bikinis, preparing to walk out on a stage in front of hundreds of people, in a swimsuit – I had nowhere to hide.

We lined up to walk on, and suddenly, I was out there, amongst the other girls, under the hot lights with the music pulsing through the stage.

What a rush. I grinned, genuinely, from ear to ear. I loved it. Everything I was scared of – the crowd seeing my imperfections, mostly – it all just melted away. I could have stayed out there all night like that. I felt great, normal, beautiful, hot. Who would have thought?

I didn’t win, and while I was somewhat devastated after all my hard work, my family were crazy proud. Knowing my history, everything I’d been through and my feelings about my appearance, that I got up there, and strutted my stuff like I owned the joint – it was big.

Years later, I still feel proud of that night.

I can’t quite believe I did it, and I really can’t believe how great it felt.

Sometimes it’s worth doing what scares you, just to see what you’re capable of.

I’ve heard of her before, because I thought it was a really interesting combination of specialties. Imagine your dermatologist treating your skin and your mind at the same time!

I think there is definitely a link between our way of thinking and what’s manifesting in and on our body – I know that the more fuss I create in my head about my skin, the worse it seems to get almost immediately!

Anyway, in this particular interview, she’s talking about hand eczema, but there’s this great quote that applies to anyone with a physical imperfection:

You think the worse you look, the worse you feel, but it’s really not like that. So much is this junk in our heads, all these shoulds and have to’s. Your mind can affect your body so much that it can actually heal a condition or improve it. Also, if your mind is in the right place, you can walk around with your arm falling off and be cool about it.

Interesting, right? Check out the interview in full.

But I feel good today.

I feel ready to take control of my disease, and try a biological treatment.

I’m trying not to get my too ahead of myself, but I do have a lot of hope that I’ll be able to get my skin to a manageable place within the next few months.

I just kinda realized that while I’m trying all these different things in my lifestyle to help keep my psoriasis at bay, it takes time, and to be honest, all my effort over the past year hasn’t really done anything to slow it down. I’m starting to wonder if maybe my assumptions about my triggers and possible irritants were a little off, and I’m not actually going to get good results on my own.

Maybe it’s time to pull out the big guns.

The thing is, I’m missing out.

And I don’t want to miss out on feeling comfortable, being able to do things I want to do, and just being a 25 year-old healthy woman.

I just want to be the best I can be, and I feel like I’m being held back a bit due to something that I could potentially be doing a better job of controlling.

I have to believe that I can be better than this – and maybe there will be a cure in 20 years, easy as that, but it doesn’t change the fact that here and now, there’s something holding me back from living the best life I can live, and I need to cut that out.

If my psoriasis was just a bit more manageable, less volatile, I’d be over the moon.

I just want to feel a little bit in control. And I’m working towards making that happen, now.

Name: Samantha Shepard

Age: 32

Lives: Texas, USA

When were you first affected by eczema? 

My family physician informed me I had eczema about 16 years ago after I found a spot on my upper arm in high school, wow that makes me feel old.


What impact did it have on you when you found out?

Not much, I used a cream she gave me and it went away. It was sporadic like that for the next 10 years or so. My skin started to get worse when I was about 25 and then took a big dive after I had my first child when I was 29.


What impact has it had on your life?

Mostly it has forced me to educate myself on how my skin works, the triggers I have and how ingredients are a big key. I have to be extremely diligent about avoiding certain ingredients, fragrances and harsh chemicals. When I didn’t pay attention my skin was very rough, scaly and red. Makeup just made it worse and made me feel less attractive. With a job in a formal corporate environment, going without makeup wasn’t something I was comfortable with either. For several years I just had this horrible relationship with myself. I hated the way I looked but felt so powerless to change it.

In 2008 we moved and a big change came when I started working from home. I didn’t feel the need to put on a pretty face of makeup every day. I saw a big change after my skin had a chance to breathe. Then after I was diagnosed with Sjogren’s Syndrome in January of 2011 I finally had a place to start. I started to understand what was going on internally that affected my skin. Now, I am more aware than ever of the horrible things we put on our skin and how it affects our health.


How were you diagnosed with Sjogren’s Syndrome, and what is it?

I had a great relationship with my doctor and went in for an annual physical. I told her I felt tired and like I couldn’t drink enough water. I also was having a hard time with my eyes. I asked her if I could be suffering from allergies (itchy, dry eyes, tired… seemed to make sense to me). She asked me some more questions and thought that I might be dealing with a food allergy. She ran some blood tests to rule some things out. As I was walking to the lab, she caught up with me and wrote on my lab orders “ANA” which is a test for Anti-Nuclear Antibodies. It’s not a common blood test but if it is higher than normal it would indicate I had an autoimmune disorder. It was a hunch she had. She was right. I was diagnosed by a Rheumatologist about 2 months later. 

Sjogren’s is an autoimmune disorder that my Rheumatologist refers to as the “little sister” of Lupus. We all have immune systems that fight off infections and keep us healthy. Autoimmune diseases cause your body to get mixed up and mistake healthy tissue for something it wants to destroy. Depending on your disease is where it attacks. Mine is Sjogren’s so it attacks glands that make saliva, tears, etc. I exhibit the hallmark symptoms of having persistent dry mouth, dry eyes and very dry skin. In the grand scheme of things it is an annoyance that I can manage relatively easily at this point. There are increased risks to being pregnant and I may eventually have to deal with problems in my kidneys or something more serious. For now, I’m just a mom with a bottle of water at all times and really dry skin.


Your daughters both have eczema, how will you help them deal with it?

Since their patches come and go, like mine did when I was younger, I don’t have the heartache that many moms out there with children with severe eczema. Ours is manageable and I hope that they just grow out of it. I think regardless of their skin problems as they grow up, I will make sure they understand the dangers of using products with tons of chemicals and preservatives in it.
Eczema is horrible but many products that people use commonly have ingredients that cause cancer. You have to read labels. If you wouldn’t eat it, you probably shouldn’t put it on your skin. That’s the message I want to make sure they understand.

Any favorite treatments or products for your skin?

I am in love with Suki Skin Pure Facial Moisture oil. It is phenomenal. I also have an unhealthy obsession with lip treatments. At any given time I have 2-5 lip balms in my pocket or purse. Right now it is Hurraw! Grapefruit and Sprout Vegan Peppermint.


What’s the one thing you’ve learned about yourself from having eczema?

I learned that I am a rebel. It’s very easy for a Dr. to give you a prescription to treat a symptom. I accepted it at first. Then one day I looked in my bathroom and saw this wall of white prescription bottles. I wasn’t just using one, I was using at least 10. Forget all the money I was spending, just the amount of times I was exposing myself to a steroid made me sit up and say “there has to be another way”.

I rebelled and started doing research into natural ways I could treat my problems. I still go to the dermatologist and the long list of other specialists that I’m supposed to visit on a regular basis, but I don’t just mindlessly take the prescription paper and walk out. I ask a lot of questions and I challenge my doctors to help me manage my symptoms naturally. It’s not always an easy conversation but in the end, it’s my health.


You can also follow Samantha on Twitter.

I had a baptism of fire into the world of having a skin condition, as went pretty quickly from no psoriasis, to having it cover 80% of my body at age seven. I was hospitalized at eight, swathed in coal tar and body stockings and blasted with UVB for six weeks.

It worked pretty well, but my psoriasis still came back, and while my dermatologists tried to keep it at bay with ointments, creams and lotions, I still had to go back to hospital for coal tar/UVB treatment two more times before the age of 16.

I couldn’t even attempt to list off all the treatments I’ve tried.I remember there was one that left purple marks where the psoriasis had been. There was the plastic patches and the special ointment that went on underneath them. There was the tube with the red lid, the one with the dark blue lid, and the one with the cerulean lid. I think I liked that one most – just for the color.

A lot of them have been smelly. I’ve actually learned to tolerate the aroma of coal tar, but I remember standing in the hospital in underwear at eight years old with the nurses applying the thick brown goop with their gloved hands. I had this little doll with a skirt that smelled like a strawberry cupcake, and I held it tightly against my face, crying, trying to block out coal tar’s stink. Melodramatic? Yeah. But that cold, thick stuff covering my body seemed pretty horrible at the time.

I moved on to the stronger stuff later on. In my early teens I tried out Methotrexate, but I wasn’t great at swallowing pills, and having to choke down so many of them turned my stomach. I don’t remember having very good results – but I was probably useless at having my doses on time.

I tried Cyclosporin at around 18, and I just recall this day shortly after starting my treatment when my skin felt like it was on fire – it went red and starting flaking off everywhere. It was like I’d just managed to piss off my skin, big time. I was miserable, and I quickly gave up on it.

I went back to UVB. It proved to be consistently successful, so it became my go-to treatment of choice through to my 20s. Luckily, my naturally olive skin could take the medical grade light. But it always came back.

After moving to the UK, I tried PUVA for the first time, the one where you take the pills and have the UVA light treatments. My skin cleared up perfectly by the end of the course. I asked the nurse at my last session how long the positive effects were expected to last and she said they wouldn’t expect to see me again for at least eight months.

Within a matter of weeks, my psoriasis was back.

Since then, I’ve gone back to UVB, with steroid ointments in between courses.

Eighteen years of struggling with this disease, and I still haven’t figured out how to kick it.

I’ve always been wary of biological treatments, only dabbling with Methotrexate and Cyclosporin before I was old enough to really understand the potential impact they could have on my health.

But I feel like it might be time to give them another shot. I know there are people out there, like Leann Rimes and CariDee English who are using biological treatments with amazing results – they’re snapped by the paparazzi in their bikinis or modelling in magazines without a care in the world, despite being seriously affected by the disease in their youth like me.

It’s great that they talk about coming out of hiding, and being ok with their conditions, but they probably has a lot to do with the fact that their psoriasis is in remission. Mine is far from it – but that doesn’t stop me hoping I can be like them, and overcome it like they have.

I’m starting to understand how serious my disease is – that I have severe psoriasis (covering more than 10% of my body), and there are treatment options out there that could considerably increase my quality of life. I need to stop just putting up with it.

I’d love to hear from anyone that has used biological treatments for their psoriasis, whether you’ve had good experiences or bad. Would you recommend it?

Psoriasis is caused when skin cells called ‘keratinocytes’ form too rapidly, due to an immune system problem. But what to treat first? The underlying problem … or the skin rash result?

With psoriasis, the immature keratinocyte skin cells get to the surface of your body before they are ready, resulting in the itchy rash that psoriasis sufferers know only too well.

Some researchers think that vitamin D3 deficiency can play a part in auto immune problems. Vitamin D3 – the sunshine vitamin – is known to help our bodies unlock the ‘self help library’ in our DNA. It has been estimated that 97% of Americans are deficient in vitamin D3.

So vitamin D3 might help with the underlying problem, but what about that itchy rash you already have? The makers of DermaTreate, a 100% herbal product that is made in South Carolina, say: “their product has a very high success rate in relieving the surface problems of psoriasis.”

DermaTreate is based on a traditional recipe. It is made from garlic extract, aloe vera gel, essential orange oil and refined salt. DermaTreate are so confident in their product that they offer a money-back guarantee.

A spokesperson for 241 Herbs, promoters of DermaTreate, commented: “If you’d like to try vitamin D3 capsules to address the underlying auto immune problem you might have – and DermaTreate to treat the psoriasis surface rash you do have – then both products are available on Amazon.”

I’m really into the idea of treating the underlying issues instead of just treating the symptoms, so this supplement might be worth a go. I do know that my skin responds well to sunshine, which gives me vitamin D, so it seems like it could be a viable treatment.

I guess we’ll see!

But now, my psoriasis is back with a vengeance.

The course of UVB treatment I had about six months ago is all but forgotten, the steroid ointments proving useless, and I’m just counting down the days until I see my dermatologist in a week.

I’m incredibly glad I called to book an appointment as soon as I felt my skin was getting beyond my control – just knowing I’m seeing her in a few days gives me hope I’ll be back to healthy soon enough.

The last time my skin got bad like this, I had to leave it for months, as I was traveling with work and didn’t have time for treatment.

I told myself I wouldn’t leave it like that again; life’s too short to spend that much time hiding such a painful secret.

But, despite my swift action to take care of it, I’m most definitely in the ‘hiding’ zone right now. My skin has been flaring up on my chest, neck, back and legs, which makes things difficult when getting dressed. I can’t show my chest, so have to stick to high-cut necklines, and shirt collars to cover my neck. Luckily, it’s autumn here in New Zealand, so I’m OK wearing trousers.

Even though I can find ways to cover myself up and get on with my life, it’s still tough; that feeling of hiding something under your clothes – knowing something is there, concealed by just a thin layer of fabric.

I feel really self conscious. And I feel really weird if someone says I look nice, or if a guy flirts with me; dismissing anything they say because I know what’s hidden underneath, the truth, and how I’m sure they’d be shocked if they saw it.

That’s something I need to work on I guess.

But right now, I’m just looking forward to knowing I have nothing to hide again.

But there’s something that sets teenage model Cassandra Bankson apart – unlike other naturally flawless beauty vloggers dominating the airwaves, Cassandra suffers from severe acne.

The video that’s making waves is this one (that she posted a whole year ago), where Cassandra bares her face completely, before demonstrating how she conceals her acne. It’s was a brave move – a video she says took her six months to post after filming it – but her courage has been an example to millions of people dealing with skin imperfections.

She has since posted several other videos about her acne, and has some great tips for acne sufferers, and those with other skin conditions, so make sure you check her out.

Cassandra shows us that we don’t have to let our skin issues hold us back!

I took a few minutes a couple of mornings this week to film some quick ‘outfit of the day’ videos and wanted to share them with you guys – always good to see how other people dress with a skin condition!